Intentionally

The kids and I discussed today the definition of "intentionally". Lots to focus on here. We looked at some of our other English words that are related to intentionally. Words like: intent ~ intend ~ intended ~ intense ~ intensive ~ intensify ~ intention.

We talked of the necessity of living life with purpose ~ of emphasizing our strong, deep devotion to the most important things in life ~ daily communication with our Creator, love and grace for our family, compassion and goodwill toward others, diligence to the work we have been given to do. Being firmly fixed in attention to the plan. Meditating on what that plan is going to be and staying true to it.

Intent invokes such a powerful response. There is no room for status quo or half-heartedness. There is no room for diversion or getting side-tracked.

So many times the things that cause us the most harm are the things that pop up when we are allowing ourselves to get distracted from the plan.

I love the verses in Ephesians where Paul describes his life as running a race. He is fixed on the goal. He runs as one who wants to finish strong. He doesn't want to fall or get tripped up by the extras of life. His eyes are fixed on the goal, and he won't give up until he gets there. That's living intentionally.

The Medium Club

Today I was challenged by Chuck Swindoll's thoughts for today. He told a story about some children who created a special clubhouse. Their club rules were simple. "Nobody act big. Nobody act small. Everybody act medium." In other words, don't act like you are bigger or smaller than anybody else. Everybody treat everybody else in the same way.

Every kid enjoys the sense of belonging to an exclusive group of other kids. They create forts and clubhouses that they can meet in and join together for fun. Being part of a team or fan club gives kids the excitement of doing something they love with other kids that have the same interests. We adults are just the same way.

We surround ourselves with people we feel comfortable with. We feel more relaxed and at ease with people we have things in common with. We form hobby clubs, book studies, and social groups to participate together in common pursuits. Now, don't get me wrong, all of this is harmless enough. These are acceptable and good things to do.

The trouble comes when we begin to think that because of all these good things, we are better than someone who doesn't participate in the same way we do. I see this so much in the Christian world. We commonly treat others differently if they don't do things in the same way that we do. If others don't like to study or worship or read the same as we do, we exclude them. If they have different standards or behaviors that we find repulsive, we treat those people different than we do other people who act and believe like we do.

This exclusive behavior is usually justified by lots of Scripture quotation and protectionist thinking about guarding our children from harmful influences. And then when we do come into contact with others who have lower standards or behaviors than ours, we somehow think we are doing good for society by reaching out to them in God's name. The root of the problem is that deep down inside, we think we are somehow better than others by acting in this way. Many times we don't want to see it this way, because that makes us have to question our heart motives.

Pride and self-righteousness are the roots that hold us to our exclusive clubs.

These thoughts make me ask some hard questions. Do I act the same way with everyone? Do I treat everyone I come into contact with the same kind of responses? Do I show favoritism toward certain people over others? Are my motives for doing kind deeds or reaching out to others for selfish reasons? Do I really think that I am any more acceptable to God because of any THING I do?

Or... Does love and compassion drive me to treat everyone the same, no matter their behavior or belief system? Do I belong to the Medium Club?

On Guard

The dusk light was still shining through the trees; just enough light to reveal the figures of four young boys playing under the tall oak trees. Makeshift swords and plastic shields were swung wildly as my four young warriors battled one another and defended each other all at the same time.

If I could forever imprint these few minutes on my brain, the youthfulness of boyhood would never be gone.

I know they will all grow into young men, but I pray that the immaginations and companionship of their youth will always be with them. May they always appreciate the simple joys that come from brotherly relationships and a hearty good time. May they always be courageous comrades and never fear fighting for the Truth.

Star-Struck

The lyrics keep going over and over in my head. "Who am I that You are mindful of me? That You hear me when I call?"

On our camping trip last weekend, one of the guys in our group brought out a telescope. Now, our family loves to lie on the trampoline and gaze at the stars. We love to howl like the coyotes ~ for yes, we do have coyote packs that roam our neck of the woods. We giggle and giggle so much over the silliest things. Most of the time only a few of us actually see the falling stars because the littlest kiddos are wiggling too much. We have some rousing family fun outside at night star-gazing. We get out our telescopes and binoculars and talk of the constellations and gallaxies so far out into space. But we don't have any of the high-tech equipment to REALLY star gaze.

But... this telescope was different. It so very powerful that we could see Jupiter and two of her moons! I was truly star-struck. I am without words to describe the intensity of delight that I got out of seeing so clearly. To observe the colors and vibrancy of the planet that I couldn't see before with my naked eyes. What a thrill to experience.

A Psalm of the God-worshiper, David, says that God sees me in just that same way. He has known me since before I was born. He knows when I am sitting down or standing up. He understands my thoughts. He is aquainted with all my ways. He knows my shortcomings and my strengths. God formed me to be unique and special just for Him. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. God, the one who created all the stars and sands in the oceans, everything imaginable, has precious thoughts toward me! Such knowledge is truly too wonderful for me. It is too high, I cannot attain it. (Ps. 139)

I am special enough that God is star-struck over little ole' me! Wow. He is good. How can I not praise Him!

You Just Never Know

You just never know when you are going to be in the right place at the right time to say what someone needed to hear.

The trip to the grocery store was that for me tonight. The pantry was getting a little bare. As much as I dislike grocery shopping, I know it's something I have to do, so I headed off to the grocery store. Once there, I was basically focused on my own agenda of manuevering around other shoppers and getting what I needed as quickly as possible. At one point, I remembered an item and went to get it. That's when it happened.

A recent aquaintance and her young son recognized me. She answered my question, "How are you?" truthfully: "Not very good right now." I listened as she explained that her father was recently told that his cancer had returned and that their whole family was in emotional upheaval. She apologized for being flustered and said she felt so awkward grocery shopping at a time like this.

As her story poured forth, my heart was touched with sympathy for her, her father, and their family. Immediately, I felt compelled to share my story of how many years ago, I was diagnosed with Lymphoma. As a young adult and a new mommy, my life was totally altered by a long and tiring year of chemo treatment and radiation therapy. The contradition of doing mundane daily chores and of battling a life-threatening disease is emotionally exhausting. I could truly sympathize with her.

I used to wonder why God allowed such a hard thing to happen to me. I don't wonder anymore, though, because my story has opened up so many doors to touch other people's lives. God chose to heal me through the wisdom of the doctors and the correct medications. Why He chose to heal me while others have battled cancer much longer and harder than I, I will never know. All I do know is that, because of my battle with cancer, I can truly identify with the heartbreak of those who experience it now.

My story isn't the exact same as anybody else's. Every time I share what God has done for me, I am glad for the opportunity to be in the right place at the right time to encourage someone else who is struggling. You just never know what will happen if you are willing to share what God has done for you.

A Pond Surprise

I walk beside
Our pond, so murky.
Just to see
A snake a lurkin'.

With in a second,
He leaps on in.
Then slithers out
With something above his chin.

I look real closely.
To my surprise,
There is a frog
Below his eyes.

I run right over
To catch a snake.
I scoop him up
With a rake.

Within a flash,
I hear a splash.
Oh, shoot,
I lost my prize.



by J.M.

Babies are for Cuddling

I have always been thankful that I chose to stay home with our children when they were small. At times throughout life, I have been tempted to go back into the workplace, but everytime, I am reminded how special it is that I am able to stay at home with my children ~ even though they are not so tiny anymore.

I spent time this weekend falling in love with a sweet, cuddle-able little girl. This four month old sweetheart is about as cute as they come. She cooed and smiled the whole weekend. What a darling. My heart strings were pulled every moment spent with her. She just needs to be loved, cared for, and taught how to love.

Every touch, every smile, every cuddle, I prayed for her. May God's hand of protection and care be over her. May she come to know love in such a way that ALL her needs are truly met. May the lullaby that she hears at night be the voice of her Godly Father reaching out His love to her. May she be rocked to sleep with the stars twinkling and smiling down on her.

How many other small ones feel the same pain that she will eventually feel? I wish I could gather them up and just love on them for a while. I wish I could just take away all that pain. My heart breaks for those who just need to be loved. My heart breaks for this little darling. It is easy ~ for all of us ~ to become so busy with meeting our own desires that we don't have time to meet others' needs.

The Need to Write

I don't know exactly what I want to say, but I have the need to write.

The kids and I have been studying a lot of poems lately. By express ourselves in poetry, we have been coming up with some of the silliest, non-rhyming lines. We've laughed and laughed. Although sometimes our lines don't exactly make sense and are a little confusing, I am really enjoying hearing the stuff the kids are thinking about. Writing poems ~ or shall I say ~ trying to write poems, has never been one of my strong points. Now that I am teaching my children about poetry, I am feeling more inept than ever. Expression is what it is all about anyway, right?

We may not all turn out to be great poets some day, but we are having fun fulfilling the need to write ~ even if it is somewhat comical.

Little Girls Love Flowers

All the boys were playing on the playground or passing the football. Their voices and cheers dimmed into the background as a magical silence came over me. The sunlight glistened on her hair as she danced around in the bright green grasses ~ my girl picking flowers.

Wild flowers. Nothing special, just some small white blooms that sprinkled the meadow at the park. In her tiny fingers, though, they were treated with reverence. She delicately gathered them up and carried them to where I watched. Carefully she presented the entire bouquet to me saying, "Don't let them fall, Mommy. 'Cuz the wind will hurt them." As we drove home, she guarded them from being damaged by her rather rough brothers. Immediately upon our arrival, the blooms found their way into the glass pitcher and some much needed water. Now they stand regally at my kitchen sink reminding me of how quickly these carefree days of childhood are passing.

Darling little girls love flowers, even common, everyday flowers.

Transplanting Process Allows Growth

For some varieties, dividing and transplanting is necessary for the health of the plant. Parenting through the teenage years feels this way to me. I know that dividing and transplanting our young "plant" is necessary and will help him grow. However, anybody with teenagers can agree with me when I say that "dividing and transplanting" isn't an easy task.

Last night my gracious husband and I sat down to converse with our young man. Our oldest son is almost sixteen. In some cultures, he would be considered a man. By the standard set by most of the young people in our society, he is definitely a teenager that I can be proud of.

Obviously as teenagers become more independant and make more decisions on their own, there's going to be some discomfort in the home. This means that my "mommy side" doesn't want to see my guy grow up. When he makes mistakes, "a-bandaid-will-fix-anything" doesn't work anymore. "He'll always be my little boy" isn't as cute as it used to be either. He grew out of lullabies and bedtime prayers a long time ago. He's grown into the responsible young man that helps around the house because he sees the need to make our home run smoothly. Since he wants to use his time wisely, he stops in and speaks with the manager of a store to ask for an employment application. He welcomes opportunities to reach out and make a positive influence on his peers. He is unashamed of what he believes. He has apparently been listening and learning as we have poured our lives into him.

Although right now, I am feeling the effects of his independance, I know that he'll be alright. I am under no illusion that any of us are perfect or that we always respond the right way under pressure. But I am thankful for a level-headed husband and a respectful young man to make this transplanting process a healthy one.

How awesome that we can all three ~ Dad, Mom, and Teen ~ still sit down and talk life out. Good communication helps our family thrive even through the teenager years. This process of transplanting the young plant really will allow for growth in the years to come.

Water, Precious Water

Dry crunchy dirt
Blazing hot sun
Gaping brown earth
Crackled scorched leaves
Dead prickly grass
Withered flowers fading

My soul feels the same desolation.
The heat of the summer sun drains me of thought.
I desire nothing else than to remain,
Immovable and weary. Drought
Has me stuck in sorrow, sadness and pain.

Night clouds gather
Cooler breezes blow
Raindrops steadily beat
Thunder answers lightning
Drops gather into streams
Muddy rivers swell

Dawn brings the rain so desired.
A sootheing storm carrying my burdens away.
My thoughts now swirl with purpose and
Hope refreshed. The new day
Nourishes me to stay committed to the task at hand.

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.
Water, precious water from above.

Cultivating Children's Souls

Recently, the morning glory outside my kitchen has given me quite a lot to think about. A good gardener will tell you that sometimes a vine will grow where it is not wanted. Tediously and deliberately, I have trained this vine to grow up the trellis and along the guide ropes to higher places.

My children are so much like this morning inspirational vine. They don't just accidentally turn out as mature adults with strong character. All children, even ones as darling as mine, have selfish tendencies and attitudes. Daily dedication to the task is needed to help them along in their journey from immaturity to maturity. It takes purposeful guidance and patient assistance for our children to blossom and grow in strength. Children who are not taught to respond in love to hurting people will not naturally be compassionate for others. Personality differences will become permanent hindrances if children are not guided in how to properly handle conflict. Unmet expectations will lead to hurt, frustration and anger if children are not instructed that these obstacles can be overcome. I desire to be a consistent cultivator of my childrens' souls.

"Blessed are the children whose mothers garden in the soil of their souls. The fruit they bear will not only serve them in the future, but a whole generation will be beautified and enriched." Sally Clarkson, The Mission of Motherhood

As the Morning Glory to the Trellis

A dear friend challenged me today to dwell on this word. "Cling - (Def.)To adhere closely; to stick; to hold fast, especially by twining round or embracing; as, the tendril of a vine clings to its support; -- usually followed by to or together."

The morning glory vine outside my kitchen window keeps climbing higher. Each day, the tendrils cling more tightly and weave their way around the support. The green leaves wave in the breezes, but are not moved because of the anchoring of the vine to the trellis. A fresh and new blossom appears every morning to welcome the day.

How like this plant I want to be... ever climbing higher ... blossoming new every day... not affected by the winds because I am secured to my supporting trellis. ~ My soul "CLINGS" to you; your right hand upholds me. Psalm 63:8 ~

Words of Life

It's not a new idea or concept.... But every once in a while I need to be reminded that speaking my mind about something is NOT a good thing. This past week, I had a wonderful reminder of how important it is to think before I speak. In my selfishness, my way seemed to be the right one and those around me seemed to be wrong. Of course. I felt the "need" to speak my mind!

Thankfully, I chose to stop and think before I spoke. It was early morning and I was sitting out on the back deck contemplating all the things that needed to be said. As always, James had another idea about how I should handle the situation.

"The fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace."

"The wisdom from above is first pure, then peacable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy."

"Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing... these things ought not be so."

"We all stumble in many things. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able to also bridle the whole body."

"Mercy triumphs over judgment."

"Do not speak evil of one another.... Who are you to judge?"

After reading all these thoughts, thankfully, I wasn't so ready to speak my mind.

Attitudy Judy

My husband always cracks me up when he sees someone with an attitude... Yep, they're an "Attitudy Judy." Just a couple days ago, I overheard a couple of Stay At Home Moms discussing the troubles of potty-training, laundry, housework, and the lists goes on and on.... Yep, a couple of "Attitudy Judys." They had not one nice thing to say about their kids, their husbands, or their roles in life as stay-at-home-moms.

I felt like butting in and telling them how they sounded, but realized that I, too, at times have been an "Attitudy Judy" about my role as a stay-at-home-mom. Caring for pint-sized little ones 24/7 is exhausting work. Messy closets, dirty bathroom floors, and barf-covered sheets don't clean themselves. Laundry and dishes are never ending chores. Carpets are always in need of vacuuming, and the dust bunnies are constantly chasing each other around the picture frames. Adult conversations are few and far between. The hours are grueling and there are no pay-raises or promotions available. When I finally sit down at night, I realize, "I get to do this all over again, tomorrow!"

Our society doesn't affirm our role, compliment our choices, or encourage our decisions. When we look to the society around us to validate us, we miss out on the real stamp of approval. God always approves of selfless sacrifices. His approval is the only one that matters.

When I find myself becoming an "Attitudy Judy," I am reminded that my attitude is determined by my choices. I choose whether or not I am going to be content in my circumstances. My attitude toward my circumstances determines my perspective. That perspective doesn't necessarily change my circumstances, BUT changing my perspective will always change my life!

Focused on Design

Every plant flourishes best when cultivated according to its individual design. Some tender flowers cannot sustain life in the hot sunshine. Others will not fully develop in the shade. Even others need the constant care of a gardener; while some stubbornly refuse the attention and grow as they desire.

Several years ago, my sister and I spent many long days planning out and designing our vegetable garden. We wanted it to be both aesthetic and prolific. Many hours were spent planting, tending, weeding, watering, raking and fending off the numerous bunnies and insects that enjoyed munching on our herbs and vegetables. Strategically placed flowers and rocks made our garden more charming. In order to infuse beauty, we were purposeful with our choosings. Indeed, the final result was lovely and plentious.

Early spring and summer always remind me of this garden with my sister. Lately, I read several chapters from Mission of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson. I contemplated the idea of our lives having a design, and how we, as women, are designed in a particular way. God designed us to compliment our husbands. He specifically made women to nurture children. As a wife, mother, and friend, I desire to live my life with focus. I want my life to show the design of my Maker. I thrive best when I intentionally focus on the perfect design for me.

We produce the most lasting fruit when we allow ourselves to be cultivated by our Gardener according to His design.

Live Life Together

Sleeping bags, popcorn, pillows, and the whole family in the living room to watch a movie.

One of the things I absolutely love about our family is that we can all be in the same room together for extended lengths of time. We enjoy family games, shooting pool together, and romping on the trampoline. Some of our favorite memories are the simplest... counting shooting stars, sitting around a campfire, or jamming out to one of our many music collections. We take time to just be together ~ to get to know each other.

Something I have noticed about our society is that families choose to be so secluded. Many familes in our society today don't enjoy doing things together. Every member of the family does his/her own thing. A recent commercial for a cellular phone company boasted "family time" as the dad and two kids being online in the same room. Bringing the family together?

Don't get me wrong... we have our personality differences... after all, we have 8 people living in this house. We disagree a lot. We are not "perfect little angels." In fact, we spend lots of time playing computer games, video games and watching TV. All those horrible things that cause brain cells to die!

Most importantly, we also love to turn all that off and eat dinner together, play board games, throw football, go camping, play kickball in the yard, listen to music, or go hiking/skating/climbing/biking outside. We just love being together. Growing together. Learning together. Laughing together. The perfect plan for the Family is to Live Life Together.

Pillars of Grace and Stoic Plants

A thunderstorm blew through our area a while back. So, my husband and the older boys got out their power tools to trim up the damage on our property. One of our trees had to be totally cut down. The younger ones and I began to examine the rings of the stump. As we contemplated the years and storms that this mature, stalwart tree must have weathered, I remembered this poem of blessing in Psalm 144:12.

May our sons flourish in their youth like well-nurtured plants.
May our daughters be like graceful pillars, carved to beautify a palace.

I love this! No fairy-tale kinghts or princesses here! The blessing is not that our sons would be mighty warriors or that our daughters would be princesses who are swept away by their knight in shining armour. Not even a thought about kings, queens, or princes!

The prayer of blessing is not so shallow or temporal as these fading dreams. The picture is much bigger.... one of grandeur that lasts throughout the generations... one that withstands the comings and goings of years of life... a solid, hardy tree that endures...a sculpted pillar that adorns and beautifies.

May our gardens of life be planted with hedges to protect the inner sanctuary. May the trees of our gardens provide years of stoic refuge. May the sculptures of our gardens bring lasting loveliness and peace.

Wildflowers Song

As I was driving down the highway the other day, I felt all the weight of the world upon my heart. Pressures of all kinds had been mounting up, and I felt as though I was soon sure to explode. I had allowed even the simplest things to weigh heavy on my mind. The noise from the back seat was simply the chatter of little voices and sometimes even a giggle or two. But to my under-pressure mind, I only heard the ruckus.

In that moment, I looked out across the meadow we were passing. The wild flowers seemed to just dance in the breezes. The bluebonnets and sunflowers smiled toward the sun. The buttercups and Indian paintbrush looked as though God had freshly dipped them in brilliance. Indian blankets and Mexican hats spinkled the oranges and yellows around in perfect peacefulness. Then the Queen Anne's lace caught my attention as their lacy skirts swirled keeping perfect time to the melody of nature's songs. And I realize, the rushing traffic has no bearing effect on their song and dance. The chaos of people's lives does not interrupt their harmonies.

My heart is calmed at just the sight of these delicate creatures of beauty. All pressures melt away when I realize that I don't have to carry such a heavy load. My heart can truly be at peace just as these flowers are even midst the chaos of traffic.

The wild flower bouquet that I choose to pick this day allowed my heart to sing and dance. All it takes is a willing heart to bend and move with the breeze.

Cherishing the Breakfasts-in-Bed

Mother's Day. The one day of the year, besides Mom's birthday, in which Mom is pampered and showered with love and does no work.

I barely hear their whispers as the sun shines through the window blinds. And the six sweet faces peep through my sleepiness to deliver the first Happy Mother's Day wishes. Breakfast in bed. Strawberries and cream. Sausage, eggs, and toast. Coffee with vanilla caramel creamer. Lots of hugs and kisses. My husband and six children are wonderful. I am truly blessed.

Two weeks ago my sister and I were chatting on the phone. One of our rare cherished conversations in which neither of us wants to get off. We live so far away and are able to talk only so often. We encourage each other and challenging one another to be the women, the wives, and the mothers we truly want to be. Heartfelt and honest, we relate the news of our separate lives and listen to the other ~ wishing we lived closer. That day, she insisted that I begin a journal for others to read as well. A blog for other moms, women and friends to share.

After giving it much thought, I decided to begin. Thus begins my journey and my public journal of what I am learning in life. Life is truly lived one breath at a time. We must cherish the "breakfasts in bed" on Mother's Day, for tomorrow is just another Monday.